


The best thing you (n)ever had

by eleasofia



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Canon Compliant, First Dates, Getting Together, Holding Hands, Jealousy, Kissing, Love/Hate, M/M, Oikage Big Bang 2017
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-05
Updated: 2017-12-05
Packaged: 2019-02-07 18:45:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12847239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eleasofia/pseuds/eleasofia
Summary: When Oikawa is asked out by Kageyama for the first time, he turns him down, saying he wouldn't date someone who is so clearly inferior to him. Three years later, after Seijou's loss to Karasuno, Kageyama asks again, and despite not really (read as: absolutely not) wanting to, Oikawa somehow ends up agreeing nevertheless. It might really be time to forget about old grudges and move on. Turns out, it's even harder than he thought it would be.





	The best thing you (n)ever had

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was written for the [Oikage Big Bang 2017](https://oikagebigbang.tumblr.com). I worked in collaboration with [Vee](https://kyuuketsuh.tumblr.com/), so there's also [amazing art](https://kyuuketsuh.tumblr.com/post/168225159174/okbb2017-art-for-this-wonderful-fic-the-best) for this story! I hope you enjoy~

"Will you go on a date with me?"

Oikawa stopped splashing cold water in his face and turned around to the asker, confused whether the question had been addressed at him. "Excuse me?"

"Will you go on a date with me?" Kageyama asked again, accompanied by an awkward bow of his head, "Please?"

There was no one else around, so yes, the question was indeed addressed at him, but he wished it wasn't. Out of the many confessions he had gotten throughout his life, this definitely was the weirdest. The men's restroom at a gym was probably the worst place to be asked out, and right after he had lost the therefore last game of his high school volleyball career was definitely the worst timing for that; not to mention, he was being asked by the worst person.

"Uhm, obviously no?" he replied dismissively and scrunched up his nose in disdain, "Also, do have a death wish?! Why would you ask me for a date right after a loss?!"

"It's a victory for me," Kageyama said calmly, and slowly rose his head again so that he was able to look at Oikawa, "So you forgot."

Their eyes met, and yes, that guy definitely had a death wish, but Oikawa needed to give him some credit for being able to actually look him in the eye right after a rejection like that. He still had this goddamn blank look on his face just like back in middle school, and Oikawa couldn't even make out the tiniest stirring of emotion in his countenance. Maybe this hadn't actually meant to be a confession but the newest way of saying _'Please teach me how to serve'_.

"Forgot what?" he asked in annoyance, but he had to admit he was also confused and a little curious to find out what had led to this surreal situation.

The expression on Tobio's face didn't really change, but for a moment it seemed as if he was searching for a sign that Oikawa actually remembered whatever he was talking about. That didn't last too long, though, and all of a sudden his frown deepened and he swiftly turned around to leave, mumbling something that sounded like _'never mind'_.

And that was when it came back to him. He actually wondered how come he had forgotten about the first time Kageyama had asked him out. The question had been surprisingly different from all the _'help me'_ and _'show me'_ and _'teach me'_   which had always seemed to be the only things Tobio had been capable of thinking and saying.

Just before Kageyama reached the door, Oikawa caught up to him and held him back by gripping his arm. Tobio stopped but didn't turn around to face him. Actually, he didn't show any other kind of reaction at all; he just waited.

"I remember," Oikawa stated after hesitating for a moment, "Last time you asked, I told you I wouldn't go out with someone who isn't on my level."

"You said I should ask again once I've beaten you," Kageyama added quietly.

"So Tobio-chan, do you take everything that people say literally?" Oikawa sneered, "Let me explain it to you:  What I was trying to say back then was that you'll _never_ be able to go out with me because you'll _never_ be as good as me. I wasn't trying to encourage you."

"Joke's on you because that definitely backfired," Kageyama replied jeeringly and turned around to face Oikawa again.

"No, joke's on _you_ because you actually worked your ass off for three years to ask me out for the second time just to be rejected _again_ ," Oikawa snapped back at him.

"Don't worry, I've been planning on beating you anyway. And I'll be the one going to nationals, unlike you," Kageyama retorted, and while his facial expression still didn’t look any different from his typical frown, he definitely sounded kind of bitter.

"Oh, I don't think you understand, honey," Oikawa replied with a feigned sugary smile, "You could win a gold medal at the Olympics, and I still wouldn't want to go out with you simply because I hate your guts."

"You're hurting me," Tobio said calmly but firmly.

"Oh, I'm sorry, what did you say?" Oikawa asked scornfully, "I’m afraid I couldn't hear you over the sound of your heart breaking!"

"My wrist."

Oikawa immediately let go when he realised that he had not only still been holding onto Kageyama's arm but had also started squeezing it in anger. Tobio was rubbing his now freed and slightly reddened wrist and eyed him indignantly.

"I thought you were amazing, but I guess you're just an asshole after all," he said before turning around once again and leaving, this time for good.

He slammed the door shut with so much force that the bang echoed through the empty restroom as Oikawa stood frozen in place, staring at the spot where Tobio had been just a few seconds ago. It was really hard to process what had just happened, and he couldn't really grasp any of his own thoughts, but he definitely felt uneasy.

Suddenly, he saw the door handle being pushed down, and for some reason, his first thought was that it must be Kageyama who was returning to resume their conversation. Of course it wasn't him because that wouldn't have made any sense at all, but neither did it make any sense that Oikawa felt actually upset and disappointed the moment he saw his best friend appear in front of him instead.

"Woah, what the hell did you do this time?" Iwaizumi asked.

"How come you always assume it's my fault? That's not fair!" Oikawa protested and reflexively started to pout.

"Well, then what did the door do to anger Kageyama like that?" Iwaizumi replied and raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, shut it, Iwa-chan!" Oikawa said, but his voice was clearly lacking bite, "I might have made a mistake."

"Wow, I never thought I'd live to see the day that you-"

Oikawa didn't hear the rest of the sentence since he had given in to the impulse to storm out and run after Kageyama. If he had taken a single second to think this through, he probably would've realised how insane this was, but he hadn't, so he found himself face to face with the one guy he had just harshly rejected once again. Luckily, the corridor in which Oikawa had managed to catch up with him was empty, so at least he wasn't going to embarrass himself in front of many people.

"Listen, I'm sorry, okay? I was just being petty out of habit, and I didn't mean.. some of the things I said."

"Some?" Kageyama asked with a snort.

"You just asked at a very, _very_ bad time, you know?" Oikawa tried to explain himself.

"You told me to ask after I've beaten you," Tobio replied matter-of-factly.

"Yes, but not _directly_ after. You could've waited a day or a week.. or maybe a month? You really don't need to take everything literally."

"So, are you done?" Kageyama asked abruptly after Oikawa had finished his sentence.

"It's not like I exactly had time to prepare a whole speech for you, you know," he replied a little too snappily.

"Good," Kageyama replied expressionlessly and started to walk away again.

"Woah, wait!" Oikawa stopped him once again and hurried to block his way, "You do realise that this means _'yes'_ , right?"

"What do you mean _'yes'_? I don't remember asking you anything besides whether you were done, and you've already replied to that question," Tobio said calmly, but Oikawa could've sworn that he was enjoying this.

"I mean, yes, I want to go on a date with you!" he said emphatically, and when he realised that it was quite pushy and demanding considering everything he had said before, he quickly added a mellow _'please'_ and a smile.

"Oh, I never expected you to ask me out," Kageyama replied and apparently tried to sound surprised, but Oikawa wasn't really buying it, "I have to think about it, I guess."

"Don't push your luck," Oikawa said threateningly, but also a tad embarrassed.

He couldn't even believe it, but it kind of felt right. Maybe it really was time to let go of old grudges and move on. When he looked at Tobio, he still saw the shitty little brat from middle school, but instead of the round baby face and the big blue puppy eyes, he was met with a fierce gaze on eye level and well, he would be lying if he was saying that he didn't like what he saw. Tobio had grown up to be quite handsome, there was no denying it.

And to crown it all, the moment the words had left Oikawa's mouth, he started to smile so brightly it was nearly blinding. It was an expression he had never seen on Kageyama's face before, and it definitely looked like he wasn't exactly experienced at it since the smile itself didn't convey much happiness. But there was this excited gleam in his eyes and a faint blush on his cheeks, and it made Oikawa feel warm and overwhelmed.

"I'll call you then, okay?" he said to stop himself from doing or saying any more stupid things.

"But you don't have my number," Kageyama objected and furrowed his brow.

"You haven't changed it since middle school, have you?"

"Uhm, no?" Tobio replied with a slightly confused look.

"Yeah, thought so," Oikawa said with a cheeky grin and a slight shrug of his shoulders as he turned around to go back to his team.

He had already taken a few steps when Tobio spoke once again. "Wait, you kept my number since middle school?"

"I..." Oikawa looked back in surprise and only realised his mistake when it was almost too late. He quickly turned away again when he felt the blush on his cheeks and wondered how he had gotten himself into this mess.

"Just fuck off!"

* * *

Oikawa let himself fall face-first onto his bed. After a short moment of self-pity, he turned his head around to reproachfully stare at his mobile. It was stupid, but the goddamn thing kept reminding him that he needed to call Kageyama. Of course, he could just not do it, but that would be too cruel even for him. The mere thought of going on a date with him was horrible though.

Just what the hell had he been thinking when he agreed to it? Well, not much apparently. When all he had in mind was Tobio's warm smile and how flattering it was that there was someone out there who had been wanting to go out with him for more than three years, it was actually easy to look forward to it, but it just wasn't all there is to it.

Once he had gone to see Karasuno play against Shiratorizawa, these thoughts and feelings had all vanished again immediately. He wasn't going to kid himself by thinking that he was actually over the loss just a few days after it had happened. Deliberately going to see Tobio would be like twisting the knife in his own wound, and he really wasn't _that_ masochistic.

But he needed to stop being a baby about it and just do it, so he grabbed his phone and actually dialed the number. His call was accepted quickly.

"I was starting to think you'd never call."

"I was starting to think the same thing," Oikawa replied truthfully, "But then I thought we might as well just get it over with, so that we can realise what a bad idea this was and go our separate ways for good."

"And you still use every opportunity to tell me you hate me," Tobio said, and Oikawa actually felt a bit sorry for it, but then he remembered that Karasuno was going to nationals and he wasn't, and started to feel sorry for himself again instead.

"So, are you free this Friday? Let's say.. around six?" he asked instead of reacting to Kageyama's statement.

"Yes," Kageyama replied, "And what are we going to do?"

"Well, I was thinking about having dinner or taking a walk or something like that?"

"I didn't expect you to suggest something this cliché and romantic," Kageyama responded, and Oikawa could've sworn he heard the smirk on his face through the phone.

"Initially I was going to suggest a fight in a dark back alley, so that I can beat the shit out of you for comments like this all I want, but I figured this wouldn't be what you want, and if I do something, I do it right," Oikawa replied slightly irritated and wondered why the hell he even took this stupid date this seriously all of a sudden.

"Dinner sounds good to me," Tobio agreed, and Oikawa replied with a _'good'_ himself, followed by a bit of awkward silence.

"This is the moment you hang up," he eventually added.

And yes, he probably said it too impatiently and unfriendly for it to be an unmistakable cue for Kageyama to reply with something flirty like _'no, you hang up'_ , but Oikawa was still dumbfounded when the call was ended without another word.

* * *

"I can't do this, Iwa-chan, I can't," Oikawa whined and ran his fingers through his hair in exasperation.

"You can't do what?" Iwaizumi asked and languidly looked up from his laptop.

Oikawa knew that his best friend was probably really fed up with him, but if he had managed to stick with him through the past couple of years, he definitely could put up with this for a while longer. That's what he hoped for at least.

"I have no idea what to wear," he said and sighed dramatically, "I can't go on this date."

"I think you should wear something casual," Iwaizumi recommended.

"Oh, wow, thanks for being such a big help!" Oikawa replied sarcastically, "I wasn't going to wear a suit, you know?"

"I mean wear whatever," Iwaizumi elaborated, "You could even wear sweatpants."

"I will _not_ wear sweatpants on a first date, Iwa-chan!"

Iwaizumi shrugged his shoulders, "But Kageyama might."

"No," Oikawa immediately opposed, "Or would he?"

He heard Iwaizumi sigh heavily while he buried his face in his hands and muttered a few more _'I can't do this'_ and _'I can't go'_.

"You're actively looking for a reason not to go," Iwaizumi stated after a moment of silence.

"Well, yes, I don't care about this stupid date, and I don't want to go after all," Oikawa replied, and he knew he sounded like a sulky child, but he didn't expect Iwaizumi to simply burst out in laughter. It really wasn't _that_ funny.

"What?!" Oikawa asked indignantly.

"You're kidding, right?" Iwaizumi said and tried to stifle his laughter, "If you really didn't care, you wouldn't worry so much about what to wear. You obviously want to go, but you're nervous."

"I do _not_ want to go, and of all things, I am _not_ nervous!" Oikawa protested, "This is like the millionth date I've had. Why would I be nervous?!"

"Because the million girls and boys you went out with before were random people you forgot about again after a couple of weeks or months," Iwaizumi explained patiently, "And let's face it, you will never forget Kageyama. This is the first time you go on a date with someone you're going to have to see again at some point in your life, whether you like it or not."

"I'm sure if I leave the country, I won't have to see him ever again," Oikawa retorted, but Iwaizumi's reproachful glare made him shudder, "Or I could just wear jeans and a hoodie and try not to be an asshole."

Iwaizumi nodded contentedly. "I'm sure you can accomplish at least one of these two things."

* * *

"Let's establish some ground rules," Oikawa said cheerfully, and Kageyama sceptically but expectantly raised an eyebrow at that and let him continue.

Somehow Oikawa even managed to look him directly in the eye while talking to him although he felt like his heart might break through his ribcage any moment. He hated to admit it, but Iwaizumi had been right about this. He was nervous; _very_ nervous. And worst of all, it wasn't even a bad kind of nervous. You could probably even call it excitement.

"We're not going to talk about volleyball. I won't give you any advice, I won't teach you how to do a jump serve. I don't want to know that you're excited about going to nationals. Don't ask me anything. Don't tell me anything. Just.. _don't_ ," Oikawa elaborated and hoped it didn't sound like a prepared speech - which it totally was, by the way.

"You do realise that I am able to do a jump serve by now, do you?" Kageyama replied calmly, but also slightly amused, "And I do it nearly as well as you."

"See, that's the kind of thing I don't want to hear you say," Oikawa said and scrunched up his nose.

"Why is that such a sore spot to you?" Tobio asked innocently, and regarded him intently.

For a moment, Oikawa wasn't even sure whether he was being mocked or not, but he decided that it didn’t matter, and that he wouldn’t put up with this kind of attitude. "Oh, shut up! Or should we continue our date in a dark back alley after all?"

"I don't know what you want to do to me there, but I'm sure it would only be appropriate to buy me dinner first, don't you think?"

It took a while for Oikawa to grasp the situation. Kageyama was still looking at him unsmilingly from his big blue eyes, which made it hard to believe he had just made a joke; and not only some kind of joke, but a sexual innuendo.

Before he knew what was happening, he started to laugh, and he saw that Tobio was smiling as well. He had never expected him to be funny or quick on the comeback, but it was a pleasant surprise.

"I didn’t think you were capable of making jokes like that," Oikawa said after a while, still chuckling a little.

"Why?" Kageyama asked in genuine confusion, and the smile vanished from his face.

"I don't know?" Oikawa replied uneasily and shrugged his shoulders, "You never made a very.. human impression on me?"

Kageyama snorted. "Not human? What else did you think I am?"

"In middle school I would've said a demon sent to make my life living hell," Oikawa said with a grin, "But maybe some kind of artificial intelligence.. alien.. robot?"

"You're not making any sense," Tobio replied with a laugh.

Oikawa laughed with him, and was happy he wasn't taking it as an insult. By now all of the nervousness had worn off, and he was actually enjoying their conversation. It was easier than expected, and he didn't even need to worry about what to say.

"I know I'm not good at.. feelings.. and being social," Tobio suddenly said seriously, "But I have them, and I'm trying."

He was looking down on his hands and avoiding eye contact, which only accentuated that this really wasn't his forte. And while Oikawa had just thought that carrying on the conversation was easy, he kind of didn't know how to react to this. The atmosphere had shifted entirely within just a few seconds.

"I know," he said awkwardly, and tried to come up with something to lighten the mood, "And you're obviously not good at expressing things either."

It seemed to work since Kageyama looked up, but he shot him a death glare and kicked him in the shin under the table.

"Ouch!" Oikawa yelped, "That's rude!"

"You're rude!"

For a moment they stared at each other until it got awkward again, and Tobio was the first to look away. Oikawa just hoped for a waiter to show up and check up on them or something like this to escape this situation, but he knew that, of course, he was going to have to handle this himself. Before he had made up his mind to say something, Kageyama spoke again though.

"Can I ask you something?"

Oikawa cringed because he knew that this was just going to get even more unpleasant, but he nodded nevertheless.

"Do you remember that one time in middle school when you tried to hit me? Or the ball out of my hands? I'm still not sure what you were aiming at," Kageyama asked in an unusually low tone of voice.

"Yes, I do," Oikawa replied and closed his eyes, wishing he was somewhere or someone else right now, "And this is the moment I’m supposed to apologise for this, I guess?"

To his surprise, Kageyama vehemently shook his head. "I just want to understand. What did I do wrong?"

Oikawa sighed, and pinched the bridge of his nose. "First of all, this is the kind of volleyball-related things I didn't want to talk about. Secondly, you didn't do anything wrong. I was stressed and and on edge, and I lost control, which I shouldn't have. And I'm sorry."

"So it wasn't about me?" Tobio asked unconvinced, "If anyone else had approached you like I did, you would've reacted the same way?"

Oikawa hesitated for a moment, not really sure what he was supposed to do. He could either confirm this and forget about it once and for all or tell him the truth, when all he really wanted to do was get up and escape this situation. But maybe it was a good thing that he was finally confronted with all of this. Maybe it would help him let go.

"No," he said reluctantly after a while, "It was about you."

"I don't understand," Tobio replied with furrowed brows.

"Just like I said, you were like a demon sent to make my life living hell. You just kept asking me to teach you this and show you that although I always told you to leave me alone. You were a threat to my position, and I just wanted you to.. go away, disappear, and never come back."

"Oh," Tobio replied dumbfounded.

"Yeah, _oh_ ," Oikawa said condescendingly, "You were really annoying back then."

"I'm sorry, I didn't know," Kageyama apologised, and it was obvious that this was genuinely how he felt, "I never wanted to-"

Oikawa stopped him with a wave of his hand. "I know you didn't know and didn't mean to. And I think we have already established that you're not good at this kind of stuff, so don’t bother."

Tobio looked at him sceptically. He was probably trying to find the hidden message behind Oikawa’s words, but failed miserably. “And how am I supposed to get better at this if I don’t practice?!”

Oikawa couldn’t help but chuckle a little. “I’d rather you don’t get better at all, so you’re still worse than me at one thing at least.”

His message had apparently finally gotten across since Tobio started to smile again. It was the second time Oikawa saw him make this kind of expression and also the second time he didn’t really know how to handle it.

He took a deep breath and smiled back while trying to come up with the most pointless random question he could in order to finally change the topic.

* * *

It wasn’t even that late yet, but when they were walking home, the streets in their neighbourhood were already devoid of people, and there was something incredibly peaceful to the silence and the soft glow of the street lamps.

The cool autumn air made Oikawa kind of wish he had a scarf with him, but he was only mildly bothered by it. Simply walking next to Kageyama was exciting enough to make him feel warm from head to toe.

His head felt surprisingly empty though. Usually, he always had something on his mind and found it hard to just stop thinking, but all of sudden, he felt a strange tranquility. Instead of worrying about the next moment, there was time to appreciate the present; something he certainly hadn’t done I quite a while.

Suddenly, he felt Kageyama’s hand brush against his, and a spark shot through his fingers. Oikawa wasn’t sure whether the contact had really been accidental, but he decided that whatever he was feeling, Tobio was probably feeling it too.

So after working up his courage, Oikawa took the chance and reached for Tobio’s hand. He was definitely surprised by the sudden contact, which obviously wasn’t accidental at all, but Kageyama intertwined his fingers with Oikawa’s nevertheless.

Oikawa was happy that Tobio seemed to be absolutely okay with holding hands, but he didn’t dare to look at him until they eventually came to a stop in front of Kageyama’s house. There was nothing to be embarrassed by, and he knew it, but he felt like a mess.

There was a moment of awkward silence once again, but at some point Oikawa managed to look Kageyama in the eyes.

“I’ll see you soon then, I guess?” he said questioningly and cursed himself for being all insecure and not his usual and very smooth and charming self.

Tobio actually looked surprised for a split second, but then he started to smirk slightly. “So this wasn’t such a bad idea after all.”

“Oh yes, it was,” Oikawa replied with a grin, “I’m just prone to making the same mistakes over and over again.”

* * *

“Hello Tobio-chan,” Oikawa said cheerfully the moment Kageyama picked up the phone.

It had only been a few days since their first date, but it already felt like an eternity to him. Unexpectedly, being around Tobio didn’t make him feel bitter and jealous but warm and giddy. The only times when he still really hated his guts where when he was alone at night and had a lot of time to think and feel sorry for himself.

Maybe dating him would actually be a good thing, and the thought that it might actually make him really happy, was enough motivation to pick up the phone.

“Uh, hi,” Kageyama replied as if he was surprised.

“Wow, you seem really happy to hear from me,” Oikawa said ironically in hopes that it would make things less awkward, “Is that all you have to say?”

“You’re the one who called me,” Kageyama replied matter-of-factly, “What do you want?”

“Well, I wanted to see you,” Oikawa said truthfully and felt stupid the moment the words had left his mouth,”I thought you didn’t call because you wanted me to call you, but I guess that means you just didn’t want to talk to me at all.”

“No, that’s not it!” Tobio protested vehemently.

“And what is it then?!” Oikawa replied angrily, “You don’t need to come up with some lame excuse. You can just tell me the truth. Trust me, I can deal with it.”

“I’m not so sure about that,” Kageyama said, and to Oikawa’s surprise, it didn’t seem like an insult but more like a sad statement.

“What did you say?!”

“Oikawa-san, I’m in Tokyo right now,” he stated calmly.

For a moment, Oikawa didn’t understand why the hell he would be in Tokyo during a school week, but then everything fell into place.

“Oh my god, don’t tell me you’re at the national training camp.”

“I am,” Tobio replied quietly.

“Why didn’t you tell me?!” he asked reproachfully.

For some reason it felt like betrayal in more ways than just one. Of course he was angry and jealous simply because he wasn’t blessed with the same amount of natural talent as Tobio, and because he had never been invited to a prestigious training camp like this, but also because he felt like he was entitled to this kind of information.

“Because you told me not to tell you things like this!” Kageyama defended himself.  
  
“But this is important! You should have!” Oikawa continued to complain.  
  
“You have no right to be angry at me for doing exactly what you wanted me to do!”  
  
It probably wasn’t Kageyama’s intention to provoke him, and the things he said made a lot of sense, but every word just added fuel to the fire.

“But I am angry, and there’s nothing you can do about it!”

“You know what? I don’t need this,” Tobio said accompanied by an exasperated sigh, “I’m hanging up.”

“No, wait!” Oikawa immediately tried to stop him.

It was a knee-jerk reaction, and he didn’t even really know why he couldn’t just let it be for now, but the thought of ending the call like this hurt a lot more than he had expected.

“Please, don’t hang up,” he added when he realised that Tobio hesitated.

“And what do you want now?” Kageyama asked in an angry tone of voice.

“I’m sorry,” Oikawa said quietly, “Call me when you’re back?”

There was a moment of silence, but eventually Kageyama sighed and gave in.

“Alright, I’ll call you.”

“Thanks,” Oikawa responded with relief, “See you soon then.”

“See you.”

* * *

“So, what was it like?” Oikawa asked cheerfully, and even though he tried his best to seem sincere, he knew it sounded put on.

“I thought I’m not supposed to talk about these things,” Kageyama replied slightly confused.

“But I’m asking, so it’s alright,” Oikawa dismissed his concern with a wave of his hand.

“Fine,” Kageyama complied with a sigh but shot Oikawa a scrutinising look nevertheless.

They were leisurely strolling through the nearby park, a little too close to each other to be just friends, but not quite close enough to seem like an actual couple. Their relationship felt incredibly fragile since their awkward phone call a few days ago.

Not that there ever had been anything stable, but now it felt like they were walking on incredibly thin ice, and Oikawa didn’t dare to do anything bold like grabbing Tobio’s hand right now, especially not since a lot more people where around compared to the last time.

“What do you want to know?” Kageyama asked and jolted him out of his thoughts.

Oikawa shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know.. Everything, I guess? What was practice like? Did you meet anyone interesting?”

“Practice was actually really normal, but the gym was really modern and full of special equipment,” Kageyama started to tell, “There was this one libero who is 180cm tall, and a wing spiker who is only slightly taller than Hinata. And I met this one guy I already knew from our other training camps again, his hair makes him look like broccoli. And of course, I met Sakusa-san, and I thought he’d be the most interesting one, but he actually doesn’t even seem all that special. And there was another setter, Miya-san, he’s really good. I’m not really sure what to make of him yet, but he kind of reminds me of you. He might actually be even more intimidating, but-”

“Is that all?” Oikawa interrupted him abruptly.

After walking a few more steps, he noticed that Kageyama had stopped and was staring at him with fiercely furrowed brows.

“What the hell is your problem?!” he asked angrily.

“I don’t have a problem,” Oikawa replied as calmly as possible, knowing very well that yes, he was rude and lying straight to his face, “What’s yours?”

“I know you’re jealous! Do you really think I’m _that_ stupid?! ” Kageyama pretty much shouted at him, “Or wait, maybe I am for thinking you would actually stop taking it out on me.”

“Me? Jealous? That’s ridiculous!” Oikawa replied with a condescending laugh, “Why would I care about some random guy you met a few days ago?”

“What?!”

“What?” Oikawa repeated just as confused.

“Oh my god, you interrupted me because you thought I’m interested in someone else!” Tobio said with a somewhat smug look on his face.

“No, I didn’t! I just told you I’m not jealous!” Oikawa protested vehemently.

“Of course you are!” Kageyama replied triumphantly, “I didn’t even think of that before you brought it up. I was just referring to the training camp in general.”

“You’re delusional,” Oikawa replied and shook his head in disbelief, “This is a second date. I didn’t even want to go out with you at all. Why would I care about something like this? Do you really think you’re that special?!”

There was a moment of silence, and the look on Tobio’s face made him realise that he had gone too far with this, and that even taking it back wouldn’t be enough to fix anything again.

“You’re right,” Kageyama said coldly, “I’ll never be that special to you, and I’m delusional for ever thinking otherwise.”

He turned around swiftly and simply started to walk away in the direction they had come from. It was probably the most powerful way of stating _'we’re done here'_ , and it hurt. Oikawa had actually really looked forward to seeing him again.

He didn’t know why he had such a hard time admitting his feelings and always did things he would regret out of wounded pride, but he knew that Iwaizumi was right, and he wasn’t just going to forget Kageyama again.

The thought of this thing - whatever it even was - being over before it had even really begun made him panic. Chasing after Tobio after fucking up definitely shouldn’t become a habit, but it was once again the only option he had left.

He caught up with him quickly, grabbed his arm, and made him stop and turn around. A simple apology wouldn’t be enough this time, though, so he threw all caution to the wind and just kissed him.

At first Tobio tensed up, and Oikawa expected to be shoved away or punched - he knew he would’ve totally deserved it - but he actually relaxed and kissed him back after the first moment of surprise.

He didn’t know how long they were kissing, and it probably wasn’t long, but it felt like a little eternity. Tobio’s lips were soft and his mouth warm, and even though people were probably staring at them, Oikawa felt perfectly comfortable.

Once they parted again, there was another moment of silence, and Oikawa knew it was his turn to say something since Kageyama looked at him expectantly.

“I.. I’m sorry, okay?” he said and hoped it sounded sincere enough, “You were right about everything.”

“What exactly?” Kageyama asked.

Oikawa closed his eyes and sighed. “I was jealous. I like you. You’re special to me.”

“Thank you, but that doesn’t matter.”

“What do you mean it doesn’t matter?!” Oikawa asked filled with indignation.

“It doesn’t matter whether you like me or not,” Kageyama replied calmly, “Because I don’t like you.”

“No, that’s not true!” Oikawa protested, “You waited fucking three years to ask me out again! You just kissed me back! You’re lying!”

“Yes, it’s true,” Kageyama repeated, “I don’t like you. You’re nothing like I thought you’d be. You’re neither amazing nor anything special. You’re nothing but an asshole. We’re done here.”

Tobio tried to shove him away, but Oikawa just held on tighter. He knew that he kind of deserved this, but he was still convinced that feelings couldn’t just vanish overnight and that Kageyama was lying.

“Let go of me!” Kageyama demanded angrily and tried to shove him away even harder, but it was obvious he wasn’t doing everything he could.

Oikawa was hugging him tightly, but Tobio could easily ram his elbow into his side or knee him in the guts to make him let go, but he didn’t.

“No, I won’t!” Oikawa announced, “Not until you admit you still have feelings for me!”

Kageyama sighed in annoyance and stopped struggling for a moment. “So if I admit it, you’ll let me go?”

“Yes, I will,” Oikawa confirmed.

“Alright, I still have feelings for you,” Kageyama said through gritted teeth, “Now let go!”

“No, I won’t! As long as you still have feelings for me, there’s a chance we can make this work.”

“You’re unbelievable,” Kageyama replied totally gobsmacked, “If you don’t let go of me right now, I’ll have to hurt you.”

“Do what you must,” Oikawa responded, “But I’m sure you won’t.”

“And how can you be so sure about that?!”

“Because you want me to stop you from leaving,” Oikawa stated absolutely convinced although he didn’t even know where his confidence came from all of a sudden, “You just made me admit I like you, and if you end it right here, you’ll regret it. You’ll always wonder what could’ve been.”

Kageyama laughed. “No, I promise, if I end it right here, I’ll always remember you as the best thing I never had.”

“And if you stay, I promise I’ll be the best thing you ever had.”

When Kageyama hesitated to reply, it was clear that he was actually thinking about giving in. Oikawa could feel how fast his heart was beating in his chest because of the tight embrace, and Kageyama wasn't trying to him shove him away anymore either.

“Don’t tell me you didn’t spend the last three years thinking about how great it would be to be together with me,” he said after a while, and he knew it probably sounded a little too cocky, but he hoped it would finally convince him.

“You don’t know anything about what I think,” Kageyama tried to deny it, but it was a weak attempt.

“You’re just scared you could get hurt.”

“No, I’m not! You can’t know that!” Tobio continued to protest.

“Yes, I can because.. I’m scared too,” Oikawa admitted reluctantly, “But you’re worth it.”

Kageyama didn’t reply again, but after a while he let out a shaky breath and finally put his arms around Oikawa as well, burying his face in the crook of his neck.

“I really hate you,” he whispered after a few more seconds of silence, but the way he was melting into the touch was telling a completely different story, “You’re a manipulative asshole.”

“Aww, manipulative is a bit mean, don’t you think?” Oikawa said with a pout Kageyama couldn’t even see, “How about convincing?”

“No,” Tobio replied unamused.

“Hmm… persuasive?”

“Seriously,” Kageyama said and leaned back to look Oikawa in the eye, “Don’t push your luck.”

“Fine,” he said with a smile, “As long as I have you, I don’t care what you call me anyway.”

For a second he saw Tobio smile as well, but then he closed his eyes and leaned in until he could feel it on his lips too.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks a lot for reading! Feel free to drop by and talk to me on [Tumblr](http://atsumus.tumblr.com/com), [Twitter](http://twitter.com/eleasofiaa) or [Instagram](http://instagram.com/eleasofiaa).


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